Get all 10 Spiderlegs releases available on Bandcamp and save 30%.
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of F#%k Xmas!!!, Lower Than the Lowest Low EP, Exquisite Monster EP, A Finer World, Sample Platitudes: A Retrospective Collection, Healing Is Unique to the Individual, A Symphony for a Son and Father, funbabies EP, and 2 more.
1. |
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I was a guy
with such an upside
But now that upside
is way way down
How did I become so cynical
About everything? And
Why can’t I change
the way I see the world
To go from sad
to almost anything else
Would be a miracle
I’ve been sad
for such a long time
I know it’s something in me
that destroys/important things
when they seem
too good to be true
or too good for me
Long time sadness goes
hand in hand with self sabotage
Nothing will fuck you up
worse or longer
than a self inflicted wound
And then you can’t get away from it…
Saaaaaaaad for such a Looooong tiiiiiime.
Always thought
I’d amount to more than
just an afterthought
Someone’s sad memory
Pitied for not living up
to lofty expectations
Long time sadness
goes hand in hand
with self sabotage
Nothing will fuck you up
worse or longer
than a self inflicted wound
And then you can’t get away from it
Saaaaaaaad for such a Looooong tiiiiiime
Saaaaaaaad for such a Looooong tiiiiiime
Saaaaaaaad for such a Looooong tiiiiiime
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2. |
Rage
04:32
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How do I put into words
Something which should never be spoken —
Not just things I hoped for
But things I thought were broken
Way/before I ever found a way out—
I had to find a way through
Now I’m busting buildings
Instead of punching you
I’m bleeding for a way out
Away from everybody else—
Anyone with eyes can see how bad I’ve been
But how much concern does someone like me ever get?———
It’s like the blood in me
comes from somewhere else
where it’s heated way past the boiling point—-
Then injected into me
with such ferocity
That I instantly go
Mad king gorilla on everyone around
A one man wrecking crew
injected full of rage
And guided by my own self loathing
from destroying everything—-
Don’t get in my way
when I destroy the world
something I loved one time——
These are the hazards of total destruction
left to my own devices
I’m left alone with my rage —-
it bullies me
and taunts me,
molests me/while holding me
face down in my own shit —-
What do I do to
fight what’s inside me
How do I crush it
so I can let it go—-
How do you stand up to yourself
when you always
have to live with everything
you ever did,
win or lose
or survive
Hell is in me/I’m it’s king
And if I can’t abdicate
Then I will ruin everything—-
What does someone see
when they look right at me
Thrashing and crashing and trashing the world—-
In some ways
I feel they’d get what I’m about
Right before they take me out—-
I’m a
bad dog,
a rabid animal
My destruction ends
When you
Aim true
strike hard
and to death
Send me
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3. |
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Self imposed
My exile got to me
Loneliness—made me see
Differently and different things
It got ridiculous and tedious
Basically my destruction
Was in my hands
and they were ready to act
Here I am again
After failing at becoming a better human—
I have become an exquisite monster
Now I darken your door again
Because you’ve always brought out the worst in me
May I come in
May I sit down
May I make myself comfortable
Endlesssly?
You will only
stay Lonely
for so long
There are storms outside
And storms in me
When I try to see things clearly
I focus on unsettling things
Self imposed
My exile got to me
Loneliness—made me see
Differently
Here I am again
After failing at becoming a better human—
I have become an exquisite monster
Now I darken your door again
Because you’ve always brought out the worst in me
May I come in
May I sit down
May I make myself at home
Indefinitely?
You will only stay
Lonely for so long
There are storms outside
And storms in me
When I try to see things clearly
I focus on unsettling things
Here I am again
After failing at becoming a better human—
I have become an exquisite monster
Now I darken your door again
Because you’ve always brought out the worst in me
You will only stay Lonely for so long
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4. |
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You make everything seem
supernatural
Like out of this world weird
Crazy in a good way
Such a good way
I don’t know how to thank you
How will I ever thank you
I’m trying new things
Trying new things
Just for you
I made myself behave myself
Just for you
And maybe you’ll come back
Come back to where we were
Where we were at some point
very long ago
You make everything seem
supernaturally unnatural
Like fake in a good way
Manufactured flawlessly
And I can never thank you enough
I wish i could thank you enough
I’m trying new things
Trying new things
Just for you
I made myself behave myself
Just for you
And maybe i’ll (we’ll) come back
Come back to where we were
Where we were at some point very long ago
You’ve made dreams spill
into reality
My dreams overlap everything
It must be because of you
You have very special powers
That I could never possibly understand
I’m trying new things
Trying new things
Just for you
I made myself behave myself
Just for you
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5. |
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6. |
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7. |
||||
I was a guy
with such an upside
But now that upside
is way way down
How did I become so cynical
About everything? And
Why can’t I change
the way I see the world
To go from sad
to almost anything else
Would be a miracle
I’ve been sad
for such a long time
I know it’s something in me
that destroys/important things
when they seem
too good to be true
or too good for me
Long time sadness goes
hand in hand with self sabotage
Nothing will mess you up
worse or longer
than a self inflicted wound
And then you can’t get away from it…
Saaaaaaaad for such a Looooong tiiiiiime.
Always thought
I’d amount to more than
just an afterthought
Someone’s sad memory
Pitied for not living up
to lofty expectations
Long time sadness
goes hand in hand
with self sabotage
Nothing will mess you up
worse or longer
than a self inflicted wound
And then you can’t get away from it
Saaaaaaaad for such a Looooong tiiiiiime.
Saaaaaaaad for such a Looooong tiiiiiime.
|
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